FML: Today, I went over to a friend's house. He had almost no furniture and slept on a mattress on the floor; however, he had the most impressive gaming computer I've ever seen. He's 40.

FML: Today, a friend had invited me to Christmas dinner since I have no family close by. When I got there, she told me they had forgotten they had another dinner to go to, and asked if I would watch their kids in the meanwhile. They each grabbed a handful of cookies I had baked and rushed out the door.

FML: Today, I had a new haircut. One of my friends said, "Wow, it’s brave to try something different." I didn’t realize that "brave" was the code word for "bad."